Wanderings' Wanderings

Think About It.

(The following is copyrighted by Kenneth J. Nelan and Janet Soldon and may not be reproduced without written permission of the author. To obtain permission, please visit http://www.sacredwandering.com/contact.html.  If you would like to purchase the book, “Being An Ethical Reiki Practitioner” you can order it through Amazon.  The ISBN number is: 978-0-557-22180-6)

The Ethical Client

Yes, you there, the one looking in the window wondering if you want to be a part of this community.  Reiki is a two way street and you have just as much, if not more responsibility than your practitioner.
You are the only person who can ensure your rights are not violated, and if they are, then you have a moral and ethical obligation to report that infraction.
Likewise, as a client you have an obligation to uphold an ethical standard.  You are the only person in charge of your healing or your own deep personal change.  You are the one seeking the services of a Reiki practitioner or Energyworker.  You have some things of which you need to be aware.

It is very easy to blame others for our own actions so first and foremost, check in with yourself and see how you are doing.  Are you okay with yourself?  Do you love yourself.  If so, then carry on.  If not, then you need to know that information before heading into any healing session.  It will help you determine if you are projecting onto your practitioner or if what you are experiencing is real.  Perhaps your first healing session should be to learn to love yourself.  From there you can always heal yourself.

Who Can You Trust?

This is perhaps the first and biggest question facing the client today.  “Where do I go for a Reiki treatment?”  “How do I find an ethical practitioner in my area?”
Just one bad apple or negative experience can have a devastating effect upon the lives of many.  How can you tell if a healer might not have the same ethical standards as the rest of the community or the same ethics you are looking for?  There are no surefire formulas, but drawing upon the suggestions of other healers as well as personal research and experience, here are some things you can do to take care of yourself when seeking the care of others.

1. Look through advertisements to find a practitioner in your area.  Reiki practitioners are always advertising in local papers, or specialty magazines.  Once you find a name or two, investigate them.  If they are a business, call the Better Business Bureau to see if complaints have been filed against them.  If the person is not a business, ask to meet with them prior to having them work on you so you can get to know them.  Any reputable practitioner will be more than willing to answer any questions you have and help you feel better about your first session.  Be open to this new experience, but be on guard that you aren’t lied to or that the practitioner doesn’t make promises they can not keep.
2. Ask people you trust – including other healers – if they can recommend a practitioner.  Sometimes a prospective healer can provide you with references from his or her own clients. To respect clients’ confidentiality, they will have to ask their permission first.  But, especially if they claim dramatic success stories, they should have grateful clients who would be happy to talk to you.
3. Never be afraid to ask if the practitioner has developed a Client Bill of Rights, or something similar.  Even if a practitioner has never created such a thing, they should be able to explain their way through what they view as your rights.
4. Guard your boundaries.  The practitioner needs to be very clear about boundaries and if you feel like the practitioner is hitting on you,  or even vice versa, trust this feeling and explore it.  If there can’t be an honest dialogue about it, you may need to find a different practitioner.
5. Find out exactly what the healer is offering for services and determine how that compares to what you’re looking for. Be wary of healers who promise miracles – who guarantee they can fix whatever ails you, no matter how dire.  Ask for evidence to back up their claims.  Are there studies?  Has their approach worked for other clients with your problem?  Is the healer saying what you want to hear just to get your business, or what you need to hear to ensure your health?  Be realistic with your expectations.
6. Ask about cost up front.  Fees do not always reflect a practitioner’s capability or integrity.  Those who offer their services for a donation (usually lay healers) or on a sliding scale are least likely to be motivated by greed.  That is not to say those charging high prices are crooks, but price is generally an indication of ego.  The higher the cost, the more that person thinks they deserve higher prices.  It is important to realize you are receiving a service and so it is important to pay something – monetarily or in kind – so you don’t later feel indebted to a healer.
7. How open is the healer to your questions?  Secrecy is incompatible with informed consent.  You should be able to find out anything you want to know about a healer’s philosophy and practice as well as their techniques and methodologies.  If they are practitioners of a higher degree, they may ask to use symbols.  It is perfectly acceptable to ask what the symbols are and what they are used for.  If a practitioner refuses to give you that information, then you have no way of knowing what is being done to you so ethically you should refuse the use of symbols until you are informed as to their meanings.  It is also appropriate to ask if they are trained in the use of the symbols.  (For example, Reiki I practitioners are not attuned to use symbols.)
8. Find out if your prospective practitioner is associated with any agencies such as the IARP (International Association of Reiki Practitioners2).  Just as medical doctors have professional bodies that legislate and enforce ethical standards for their members, so too do some alternative or complementary practices. A simple phone call or fax may reveal if the healer has a record of misconduct.
   Most spiritual healing and energy work practitioners – Reiki and therapeutic touch, for example – do not have monitoring bodies, unless they belong to another profession that does. Instead, they may have voluntary membership associations from which they can be expelled for misconduct, yet remain free to practice. Again, a simple call or fax can uncover a “record.” However, a healer who chooses not to belong to an association may have nothing at all to hide other than not being a joiner.
9. Don’t be a loner. If there is anything you find suspicious about your therapist, discuss it with someone you trust.  If you’re going to be alone with a healer who has yet to earn your trust consider having a friend accompany you and be in the room during your session.  Any ethical practitioner will warn you about the private nature of your healing session, but will also acquiesce to your needs.  Remember, you are in control.
10. Search yourself.  Are you looking for healing in all the wrong places? Some people go from one therapist, workshop and/or seminar to another when what they really need is a good counselor.  Sooner or later, denying psychological problems that may make you vulnerable to misconduct by an unethical healer.
11. Above all else, maintain your own self-responsibility.  You do not owe a healer your loyalty ‘no matter what.’  The healer provides a setting and the tools, but it’s up to you to choose whether to participate in any activity, whether to follow the healer’s directions, or whether you walk out the door.  It’s your health and welfare that is on the line, not the healer’s.  If something doesn’t feel right to you, it may not be right so listen to your gut!
12. You need to know what to expect during a session.  If you have never had a session before, then this is especially important information as it can help alleviate fears or worries.  The practitioner should be able to describe what is going to happen during the treatment.  If not, find someone else.
13. Perhaps one of the most important things to remember is that if you feel forced into proceeding with your session, then you need to leave immediately.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200.00.  Find the nearest exit, and go; even if it means going out through a window.  You should never feel forced into doing anything and if you do, you will never receive the healing you need.  Instead you will be focused on the abuse you are suffering at the hands of your healer.

The above thirteen guidelines are nothing more than common sense suggestions of how you should find a practitioner with whom to work and help you make an informed decision about your healing session.

One thing in particular to be aware of, is anyone who claims they can heal anything and everything from which you may be suffering.  First of all, the practitioner is not the one who does the healing.  They are merely a facilitator for the energy to go where it is needed, when it is needed.  Be especially careful if someone tells you to do only whatever they tell you to do, or that they must be the only practitioner you go to.  Such behavior is indicative of a person with a superiority complex.  That person is probably looking for someone they can control.  Ultimately, you may or may not receive the healing you need, but one thing which can be guaranteed is that you will be abused by such a person and end up scarred from your experience.  This is not being said to scare you, but to merely make you aware such things happen no matter the industry.

Listen for key words and phrases.  If a practitioner tells you they may be able to help alleviate a symptom, or help you with what you are going through, then you are talking to someone who has experience and knows they are not the healer; that is the type of person you should be trusting as they are willing to see what happens, but can not give you an actual guarantee of healing.  The practitioner understands there may be underlying conditions or reasons for what you are going through, and that only through balance healing can you achieve your own goal.

It is not your healer’s path, but yours and yours alone.  You will have to live with yourself and the consequences, ether positive, or not so positive, and not your healer.

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